An Attempt At Humor.(Includes tales of Tyrion Lanister, the late president Robert Mugabe and our very own president, Mr. Museveni).
After it all, we die.
For me, this feels like the greatest irony. Right up there on the list with the unfortunate and absurdly abrupt ending of a promising affection between the two leads in Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. To quote the English band Depeche Mode in one of their songs, “I think that God’s got a sick sense of humor.”
Harsh? Maybe even a tad dramatic? Meh! I don’t bloody think so!
Anyway, I have been alive for a while now, and thus like to think I know a thing or two about life. Like most everyone else who is alive, I too have my very own, very personal theories and occasionally I am fueled by a sometimes childish and irrational passion in those convictions.
For example, one day I think that being alive is delightful, and yet turn around the next to find myself questioning the purpose of it all, oftentimes even concluding that the entire roller coaster is distastefully futile!
Some days are sunny and as glorious as a scene in one of Walt Disney’s naive animations, while other days are these dull, overwhelming … creatures that have powerful limbs with the strength of a thousand men and have the ability to shred your will to live to tiny pieces! That can blind all possibility and drown you in an ocean of helplessness if you do not fight back, powerless and incomparable in strength though you may be.
Yet as I acknowledge all this a quote from one of my favorite actors in all the world, Game of Throne’s Tyrion Lannister catches my attention. He once said, “Death is so terribly final, while life is full of possibilities.”
That sounds a little absurd, because it makes me sound mildly suicidal. Like I must be debating the pros and cons of living versus ending my life if I thought enough about it to reach this conclusion. Not really, I’m only saying that granted, I see the bad sometimes and in a vulnerable moment of weakness and self-pity I may even think it futile to live, but wisdom such as the one behind that lovely quote changes your perception. In a way anyway.
And to clarify, I am not. Suicidal. Far from it, actually.
I want to live long enough to see how old Mr. Yoweri Kaguta Museveni will be when he steps down from presidency. If I were to predict, and I will because this is MY article, I think he’ll give president Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe a run for his money.
My man! Rah!
Anyway, He was so wise that guy, right? Not president Museveni. Or Mr. Mugabe for that matter, bless his soul! His memes were part of the reason I liked Facebook. He gave us girls so much to think about, although often you had to dig deep underneath the thinly disguised insults to find it. Look at this one.
See this one.
Hehehehe
Hilarious! Say what you will about him, you can call him names, but the guy had flare and anyone who has over 3 pages of memes when you type their name in Google deserves to be respected.
But no, I meant neither Museveni nor Mugabe. I meant Tyrion. Very wise. And funny, full of sarcasm and chivalry! If you missed him, you lost the once in a lifetime luxury of walking the very halls that are a troubled visionary’s mind! In my opinion. Which again is the only opinion here that matters because again — my article!
But back to what I was saying.
Which is that I think I know something about life and what to expect from it. That although I may not have the dynamics straightened out, more often than not even if I may not appreciate adversity when it befalls me or those around me, I’m not entirely surprised by it. Spend two weeks having things going spectacularly for you and my guess is you’ll be wailing yourself to sleep the third week. Seriously. Like the legend Lucky Dube sang, ‘that’s the way it is.’
Once or twice every too often though, life surprises me.
A stranger I only just met realizes I forgot my phone on a toilet paper holder in a loo down town and runs after me to return it. A mysterious and highly contagious disease of the flue variety plagues us all and ‘ threatens the entire human race’. Someone I terribly offended forgives me and surprises me by continuing to keep my idiot company. A jolly, dimpled baby I don’t know reaches out and takes my hand, unafraid and trusting, along Kampala road when I stop to buy Airtime from a street vendor.
It is almost as if, to scoff at my smug supposition that I know what to expect from it, life spins a web of happenings that are so unexpected I am immediately snapped right back to the reality. Which when put simply is that I am wrong. I am humbled like the proverbial dog with it’s tail hanging between it’s legs. No, I realize, I don't have it all figured out.
This truth is as much irritating as it is relieving(Give me a minute to decide which one I like better). If I had everything figured out the whole way, life would get unsavory. It’d become predictable and boring! But all is not lost and I’m coming to terms with the spontaneity of it all.
Which is dope!
And as soon as I find the purpose for which I just wrote all the above nonsense, I’ll let you know:)